Wednesday, 19 June 2013

My dog peed glitter.

So yesterday my family got home at night, and I saw that my dog peed and shat on his newspaper so I decided to go clean it up. But as I walked towards it, something sparkled.

I stared closer at his dried-up pee and realized there was glitter in it.

And it couldn’t have been that someone decided it was funny and threw glitter all over his pee as a joke because we weren’t home when he relieved himself, and plus the glitter was embedded into the newspaper with the pee in the shape of a puddle.

I tried to recall if I’d used glitter in any recent craft project or whatever because maybe he’d accidentally ingested it but no, the last time I took out my bottle of glitter was in January when we dressed Martin up as a mermaid at the Aquarium Park. And even if he ate glitter, it should be coming out in his poop right?

I’ll show you a picture.

Yes that’s what I said, I’ll show you a picture. I’m warning you ah don’t say I never. I’m warning you now. If you are afraid of pee don’t blame me if you scroll down and puke.




This was taken with my phone. Okay I know most cameras don’t do justice to the shiny nature of glitter because it just becomes white specks, but yeah close enough.

So at first, I was really excited and had all these fantastical ideas about how my dog is slowly evolving into a unicorn and how I could totally use a unicorn as a pet like we could go on magical rainbow adventures together and other cool things like that
..but then I googled ‘my dog peed glitter’ and the results kinda burst my bubble.

They said that the glitter was actually crystals that formed when his pee dried up because it was too concentrated. They said if this carries on, my dog might be having UTI/kidney stones or something, which of course, freaked me out (though I have to say I was definitely more disappointed than anything else to find out that my dog wasn’t a unicorn after all).

But he’s fine today. In case you were wondering. All his pee puddles dried up glitter-less. I think he just didn’t drink enough water yesterday because all of us forgot to refill his water bowl when we went out in the morning.

Actually I believe he’s just okay because I made him pray with me after the incident.

And also because I force-fed him water a lot of times after that, like I would seize him prison-torture style and shove his face to his water bowl and make him lick it all up but it was all for his own good.

Tuesday, 18 June 2013

I passed my driving FTT!

*I am pretty claustrophobic so the only kind of dance parties I know of are the ones at home where I’m all by myself. I have never stepped into a club or anything before but I hope you like my interpretation of those strobe lights.

You probably think I’m a bit too excited, because I just passed a mere theory test, not even the practical driving test. In fact, you probably think I’m a lot like the fat dude who just won the wii tennis championships but has never actually played tennis before in his life.
But trust me, this was really huge for me because of how high the chances of me failing was.

I had so much to do the past week, I only started studying a day before. I finished reading the FTT handbook in the morning of my test, and didn’t even have time for the Q&A book. I just did one online trial (which I failed for that matter) before leaving for the actual test.

Yet I had so much peace the whole time leading up to it I don’t know how. This pass was by so much grace, I don’t even. All Jesus man.

Anyways, on a pretty random but related note, I think they need to re-edit and reprint the FTT handbook because I cannot stand how it has so many grammar mistakes in it.

I tried to restrain the inner grammar Nazi in me from getting angsty but it was really quite frustrating, especially when I was trying to speed-read due to time constraints.

I remember there was this page that had like 3 grammar mistakes altogether which is way too many for a single page to handle you poor page
Then in the actual test itself, there was a grammar mistake in one of the questions and it really bugged me. I mean I know in Singapore we just Singlish all the way, anyhow talk etc but even in school all test questions had to be grammatically sound because they were official tests and this was an official test and official things cannot have mistakes they cannot.

The question went something like this: 

But that’s just my OCDs speaking I am truly very happy that I passed so I am just gonna go and comfort some book pages and dance some more.